The Main Street Church of Satan

We are the first above-ground organization in history openly dedicated to the acceptance of Man’s true nature—that of a carnal beast, living in a cosmos which is permeated and motivated by the Dark Force which we call Satan.

Ordinarily I have a great appreciation for truth, transparency, and honesty, but this mission statement of sorts is just a bit too spot-on for my comfort. The open rejection of God is somehow more shocking than the passive forgetting of God... Or ignoring of God... When you go so far as to openly identify with and embrace the other side... The enemy.

Still, in a way it is refreshing to encounter true believers in all their forms. It cuts through the crap that regularly distracts us...

1. Satan represents indulgence instead of abstinence!
2. Satan represents vital existence instead of spiritual pipe dreams!
3. Satan represents undefiled wisdom instead of hypocritical self-deceit!
4. Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it instead of love wasted on ingrates!
5. Satan represents vengeance instead of turning the other cheek!
6. Satan represents responsibility to the responsible instead of concern for psychic vampires!
7. Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse than those that walk on all-fours, who, because of his “divine spiritual and intellectual development,” has become the most vicious animal of all!
8. Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!

9. Satan has been the best friend the Church has ever had, as He has kept it in business all these years!

Isn't this part of the Democrat Platform?

Oddly enough, if true evil can be measured... And is directly proportional to its ability to mislead and deceive - then these people are much less evil than many Protestant Churches in America.

At least they appear to possess some of the basic concepts... Even if they have chosen the wrong side.

Next week... Rosicrucianism. Send your religion FTD!