Thursday, October 29, 2009

Amazing Knowledge for November

I may be a two-bit, mediocre medical technologist, but my job affords me insight into amazing medical knowledge. Oh, people talk about Mayo's and Johns Hopkins, but those of us in the business know that the real innovations and advancements are taking place at small, rural, Indiana hospitals. Most the time when I'm in the lab, I just sit there with my eyes glazed over, mentally processing some new amazing thought. Other times I'm alert and actually paying attention to what I'm doing.

But before you become disproportionately impressed with me, let me get to this month's amazing medical knowledge:

Why We Wear Gloves

When I wear latex gloves I can't draw blood worth crap. I was trained pre-AIDS, and back then we donned gloves only when we were handling fecal specimens or when there was a possibility of getting something really icky on our fingers.

Fortunately, the only time I'm called upon to draw blood these days is when at least two other techs have already failed to acquire a blood specimen. These patients are referred to as "difficult sticks" and the hospital staff cares enough about its patients to look the other way when I perform my magic... ungloved.

By the time I enter the patient's hospital room, the patient is usually scared, upset, or thoroughly PO'd. I stroll in, sporting my best down-home demeanor, speaking slowly and relaxed like an airline pilot... And as I make a show of washing my hands, I use phrases like "You poor thing" and "We appreciate your patience." Then I generally say, "Let's just take our time and see what we can find." My aim is to make the patient confident both in my abilities, and the fact that I care about him.

But back to why we wear gloves...

When AIDS was brand-spanking new, the medical community erred on the side of caution in most instances, because it was not yet known how virulent the disease was, or how likely it could be spread in clinical situations.

Someone... I suspect someone sitting behind a desk, decided that lab personnel would be safer if they wore gloves when they performed venipunctures. The fallacy in that decision is obvious when you consider that 1) gloves make the tech less dexterous, more clumsy, and 2) latex gloves will not stop a needle. Therefore, in an effort to make us safer, the powers that be have surely increased our risk of infection with blood-borne pathogens, because gloves make it more likely that we will stick ourselves with a dirty needle... Especially those of us who did not begin our careers using gloves.

But what really tickles us is this: Most of our patients think that we are wearing gloves for their protection. In fact, patients have actually written letters to our hospital complaining that the tech drawing their blood did not wear gloves.

A couple of the techs that have been "turned in" have complained that, though I hardly ever wear gloves, I've never been turned in. I tell them, "The reason is simple, really... I'm Malott... And you're not."


Sunday, October 25, 2009

Euphemism for the Day

"Spending eternity without Christ..."

Obama's Enemies List

Forgive me if I leave anyone out, but Barack Milhous Obama, or Barry Capone as we say in Greentown, seems to add new members weekly... And it's hard to keep up.

So here we go: Insurance companies and unrepentant doctors who surgically remove feet, pharmaceutical companies, terrorist American veterans, tea party attendees, town hall attendees, white policemen, the Chamber of Commerce, talk radio, FOX News, Wall Street and people who like to profit from their work, coal producers, oil companies, SUV drivers, Republicans, Dick Cheney, and of course... George Bush.

Soon to be added: The Independents and Moderates who voted for the guy who would "set aside childish things" and are quickly becoming disillusioned, Blue Dog Democrats who refuse to destroy their careers by toeing Obama's line, and the liberal mainstream media that refuses to ostracize FOX News.

I hope our post-partisan president hurries up and completes his Enemies list so he can get back to the business of uniting us all.

Quote for the Day

"I don't always get my most favorable coverage on Fox, but I think that's part of how democracy is supposed to work. You know, we're not supposed to all be in lockstep here."
--President Barack Obama, February 2009


Friday, October 23, 2009

Time for an "honor killing " update...
Police in Arizona are hunting for an Iraqi-American father who they say ran over his daughter with his car to punish her for becoming "too Westernized" and rebuffing the conservative ways he valued.

Noor Faleh Almaleki (above) is in "life-threatening condition," Peoria Police spokesman Mike Tellef told ABCNews.
I'd hope that every reasonable, moderate, and law-abiding Muslim man in the country cringes when he reads such a story... Or do many secretly admire and sympathize with this man? Their silence may reveal something very ugly.

It's been a little over a year and a half since... two teen sisters were found shot to death inside a cab outside a Texas hotel, and their father, who police say is the sole suspect in the New Year's Day killings, remains at large.

Authorities tell ABC News that the investigation so far has produced few solid leads as to Yaser Abdel Said's whereabouts, and they fear he may have fled the country, perhaps even to his native Egypt.

So far Rifqa Bary, the Ohio Muslim teen who converted to Christianity and then fled her family fearing for her life, only to be ordered home by a Florida judge... So far she is still alive... And quaking in fear, I suspect.


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Obama Criticizer - String of Failures

This is Rush Limbaugh's call screener. Being black, he is able to criticize Obama, without being called a racist.

...And I wouldn't tell him to "get back on the porch..." At least I wouldn't recommend saying it to his face.

Be Mao, Be Mao Baby

Anita Dunn, Obama's White House Communications Director, said in a speech recently that Chairman Mao was one of her favorite political philosophers.

I believe her.

If Mao Tse-Tung had been born in America... Say... in 1961, and if he rose in politics... maybe in Illinois, as a charismatic Chinese-American... And if he was looking to impose socialism on the American people, not through revolution, but through the political system... If he became president and began seizing corporations and expanding the size and control of the federal government...
Yes, I believe her.

(doctored photos from Matt's Meditations)


Monday, October 19, 2009

Wallace: White House is Biggest Bunch of Cry Babies I've Dealt with in 30 Years

From : The White House escalated its offensive against Fox News on Sunday by urging other news organizations to stop "following Fox" and instead join the administration's attempt to marginalize the channel.
The White House stopped providing guests to 'Fox News Sunday' after Wallace fact-checked controversial assertions made by Tammy Duckworth, assistant secretary of the Department of Veterans Affairs, in August. Dunn said fact-checking an administration official was "something I've never seen a Sunday show do."

From Malott's Blog : The reality is that liberal ideas cannot stand up against conservative ideas in a debate. Liberal ideas can only be sold in an unchallenged speech from a lecturn. If Obama's boys and girls could be successful against the probing questions of REAL reporters, they would be on FOX every day.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Still the Carrot King

I took the last of my carrots from my garden today. I plant them in a raised bed in the middle of June. They turn sweet with the cold temperatures in the fall.
I will store them in the bottom drawers of my refrigerator, and I will still be using them next spring.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Rush Limbaugh Dropped

From Malott's Unabridged Pocket Dictionary:
racist (ras' ist)
1) A white man who believes black men are as capable as white men and do not need the Federal Government's help to be successful in life.
2) A white man who is politically conservative. (see Rush Limbaugh)
3) A white man who votes for Republicans.
4) A white man who criticizes Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, Charles Rangel, or any other powerful, black race-baiter.
5) A white man who offends liberals by not towing the liberal line on any matter concerning African-Americans. (see hate speech)
syn. Republican, conservative, NASCAR fan

ST. LOUIS (AP) - Conservative radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh has been dropped from a group seeking to buy the St. Louis Rams. Limbaugh was to be a limited partner in a bid led by St. Louis Blues chairman Dave Checketts, but Checketts said in a statement Wednesday that Limbaugh's participation had complicated the effort. The group will move forward without him.

The move against Limbaugh was propelled by left-wing media, liberal sportscasters, and liberal athletes, using supposed quotes from Limbaugh that mysteriously cannot be found in any recording.

Limbaugh said that he never made those statements, and that if he had, his African-American call screener, Bo Snerdley, would have walked out years ago.

I once called the show and talked to Mr. Snerdley. He was not smooth or polite. (Imagine calling ACORN). He was very intimidating. He had the kind of voice... Well if I was in a dark alley and I heard that voice behind me, I would immediately urinate into my drawers.

"This is not about the NFL, it's not about the St. Louis Rams, it's not about me," Limbaugh said. "This is about the ongoing effort by the left in this country, wherever you find them, in the media, the Democrat Party, or wherever, to destroy conservatism, to prevent the mainstreaming of anyone who is prominent as a conservative.

Limbaugh, of course, is not a racist. He celebrates conservatives of all colors. His problem is that he debunks liberalism in a way that is not politically correct... And that he is very effective when he does it. This makes him the target of the liberal media who can distort his words with impunity.

Looks like the liars won this time.

Quote for the Day

"Beware the prophet seeking profit."
--Dennis Miller, on Al Gore and Global Warming


Tuesday, October 13, 2009

The Abortion Addict

A woman has admitted to being 'an abortion addict' after having 15 terminations over 17 years.

Irene Vilar said she had the abortions not from poverty or fear but as an extraordinary act of rebellion against her 'controlling' husband who did not want children.

The cycle of pregnancies and abortions, which began when she was 16 and ended when she was 33, was also punctuated by several suicide attempts.

Now a successful literary agent with two young daughters, Loretta, five, and Lolita, three, Mrs Vilar has written about her experiences in a memoir, called Impossible Motherhood: Testimony of an Abortion Addict.

That's nice. Now she can make money on her dead babies.

I just can't get my mind around... 15. That's like rounding up 5 families that have three kids each, and wiping out the kids. She killed half of a grade school classroom. It's like snuffing out the lives of little Joey, Bethany, Kristen, Elijah, Tommy, Annie, Janie, Emma, Jacob, Daniel, Olivia, Chloe, Michael, Elizabeth, and Matthew. It's like killing the Brady Bunch kids and then wiping out the Waltons, before heading down the street and polishing-off Wally and the Beaver. This woman snuffed out 15 little bodies. 15 little minds. Her own precious children.
Why is she smiling?


Saturday, October 10, 2009

Quote for the Day

"I talk to women overseas who make 50 cents a day busting rocks with a hammer to make gravel, and they come to Jesus and tell me they have everything... They have this effervescent joy. And then I come to the United States and speak to Christian women all across the country... And they sigh... They have no joy or sense of purpose... And they can't figure out what the problem is."
--Michelle Rickett

How I Look When I Get Up

This is how I look when I get out of bed in the morning. And this is the edited version. This is after the picture has been adjusted to make me look my best.
I know you didn't ask for this. But why should I suffer alone?

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Jack Webb Schools Obama on Respect for Police

I love it.

Dragnet was a great show...

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Quote for the Day

"We should stop the comparisons to Hitler. At least Hitler got the Olympics to come to Berlin."
--LC Lone Haranguer


Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Texas Tech National Anthem

The two young girls on the right are six years old. The two in the middle are seven and the one on the left is eight.

Saturday, October 03, 2009

Rio Bad for Obama

OBAMA: "There is nothing I would like more than to step just a few blocks from my family's home, with Michelle and our two girls and welcome the world back into our neighborhood. At the beginning of this new century, the nation that has been shaped by people from around the world wants a chance to inspire it once more."

MICHELLE: "But I never dreamed that the Olympic flame might one day light up lives in my neighborhood," she said. "But today, I can dream, and I am dreaming of an Olympic and Paralympic Games in Chicago that will light up lives in neighborhoods all across America and all across the world."

MSNBC, NATALIE MORALES: A lot of confidence here from the Chicago delegation, uh, particularly after the president and first lady made such a passionate and emotional appeal to the IOC voters here... Uh, you know, it remains to be seen what will happen in the next couple of hours because it's scheduled to go for a vote about 12:30 Eastern time but, uh, a lot of people feeling like this is Chicago's time.
Oh, it was crazy. We in the press we were all standing there waiting to see if the president and first lady would even walk by us! But he kind of got stuck behind a wall as, uh, the IOC pretty much rushed him. Everybody seemed to really want their picture with the president, shaking hands; and of course the IOC voters trying to appear somewhat impartial but you could tell that they, too felt the rock star power there that the president and first lady were exuding.

CNN, TONY HARRIS: Chicago is out? Chicago is out? Madrid is still in? Tokyo is still in? Wait a minute, Chicago is out?

LOS ANGELES TIMES: "Chicago's Swift Elimination at 2016 Olympics Host is Political Blow to Obama."

THE DAILY MAIL UK: "Humiliation for Obama as Chicago is Eliminated in First Round of Voting."

UK TIMES ONLINE: "Obama's Olympic Failure Will Only Add to Doubts About his Presidency."

JESSE JACKSON: I would like to know what happened, 'cause there's always underlying politics in these decisions, but I'm shocked and saddened, and I really anticipated we would win. We sent our A-team, president, first lady, made such a great presentation; the mayor, the governor, Oprah Winfrey, our Olympic -- Olympians.

Nothing succeeds like success. Nothing fails like failure.


Thursday, October 01, 2009

Welcome to the Freedom First PAC

Gee Tim, that's nice. But you know what I want? I want the strongest conservative candidate that the Republican Party can field in 2012. I hope the primaries deliver him, or her, to us. I don't care if the name is Pawlenty, Palin, Jindal, Romney, or even Huckabee... I want a winner. Because we can't afford to fail.

Pawlenty's Church

THE PURPOSE of Wooddale Church is to honor God by making more disciples for Jesus Christ. A disciple commits to obey Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord—growing in knowledge of God, service for God, and sharing of God.

WE BELIEVE that the Bible is the verbally and plenarily inspired Word of God, inerrant in its original manuscripts. The Bible is our supreme and final authority in faith and life.

WE BELIEVE that Jesus Christ was conceived by the Holy Spirit, and born of the Virgin Mary, and is true God and true man.

WE BELIEVE that the Lord Jesus died for our sins according to the scriptures as a representative and substitutionary sacrifice; that He rose victorious from the grave on the third day; and that all who believe in Him are justified on the ground of His shed blood.

WE BELIEVE that all Christians are baptized by the Holy Spirit when they are born again. We believe that water baptism by immersion is the biblical testimony of the professed believer in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

WE BELIEVE that those who partake of the Lord’s Supper should be born-again believers, walking in fellowship with the Lord Jesus Christ.

I suspect Jeremiah Wright need not apply for employment at this Church.

A Young Girl's Testimony

Two weeks after Polanski plied her with Champagne and a Quaalude, Samantha Gailey appeared before an L.A. grand jury and recalled Polanski's predatory behavior in a Mulholland Canyon home owned by Jack Nicholson.

The teenager's troubling--and contemporaneous--account of her abuse at Polanski's hands begins with her posing twice for topless photos that the director said were for French Vogue. The girl then told prosecutors how Polanski directed her to, "Take off your underwear" and enter the Jacuzzi, where he photographed her naked. Soon, the director, who was then 43, joined her in the hot tub. He also wasn't wearing any clothes and, according to Gailey's testimony, wrapped his hands around the child's waist.

The girl testified that she left the Jacuzzi and entered a bedroom in Nicholson's home, where Polanski sat down beside her and kissed the teen, despite her demands that he "keep away." According to Gailey, Polanski then performed a sex act on her and later "started to have intercourse with me." At one point, according to Gailey's testimony, Polanski asked the 13-year-old if she was "on the pill," and "When did you last have your period?" Polanski then asked her, Gailey recalled, "Would you want me to go in through your back?" before he "put his penis in my butt." Asked why she did not more forcefully resist Polanski, the teenager told Deputy D.A. Roger Gunson, "Because I was afraid of him."

This shouldn't happen to children. Any adult who hurts a child must be punished. Looking the other way or making excuses clouds an issue that decency demands remain crystal clear.