Thursday, April 27, 2006



For Those Who Like Their Bugs Big

LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Residents of Southern California have reported record numbers of uninvited guests invading their neighborhoods and homes this spring. The visitors are a rare species of praying mantis indigenous to Mexico and whose northern range, until this year, had not reached Mexico's border with California. Emergency Rooms throughout the region report a heavy influx of patients with symptoms that range from mild dermatitis to bites that require butterfly enclosures and antibiotics.

Chief Entomologist Clarence Biddle stated in a news conference at the CISRFB, "Most of these bites happen at night when the mantis seeks warmth and ends up crawling between the sheets of the victim's bed. However office workers are also at risk as these insects often hide on the underside of computer desks where they can benefit from the warmth of the computer."

Biddle, who has served at the Institute since its inception in 1982, feels that the appearance of this insect is a product both of climate change and the increased use of certain pesticides south of the border. "This species may become a permanent fixture in the southwest, which is particularly disturbing because it's such a nasty critter. I've been studying insects all my adult life and this one really creeps me out."

Officials at the CISRFB (California Institute for the Study of Really Frightening Bugs) feel that the appearance of this praying mantis in California may have more far-reaching consequences than the Canadian Cockroach Migration of 1939 which devastated the agricultural industry of upstate New York.

Am I concerned about these developments? To be sure. I have a good friend in California and I just hope this news doesn't give her the "willies" every time she sits at her desk or crawls into bed. No one wants that.

7 comments:

SkyePuppy said...

Oh great! I made sure to check under my desk before I started this reply. I think I'm clear. It should be hard for one of these things to get up to the seventh floor.

The one piece of good news in this article is that they haven't made it to Indiana, because I don't think Christina could handle that.

They missed a potential reason for the influx of these horrible creatures into California. They could be hitching a ride with the flood of illegal aliens crossing the border. This just gives us one more good reason to build the fence.

Anonymous said...

Skyepuppy,

I don't want to discourage you, but from the looks of those things, I'm not sure a fence would slow them down. They might just eat it.

I think I'd be packing up and leaving California to the mutant bugs.

Anonymous said...

You had me until the fourth paragraph I'm embarassed to say. And that is why this is anonymous.

Malott said...

Skyepuppy,

Your state would probably try to get them healthcare and educate their larva.

Then your local PETA chapter would get involved and it would be all over.

Don't forget to check between your sheets tonight.

Christina said...

Well, Skyepuppy beat me to the punch. I was going to suggest that the influx could be due, at least in part, to all the illegal aliens that they are arriving with.

Dang it, I wanted to post that first!

And yes, Skyepuppy, I really couldn't handle these critters. I've never been afraid of praying mantis' before, but giant biting ones...that's a different story.

Gee thanks, Chris. One more bug to worry about. Oh and double thanks for the huge pictures so I can visualize them even better.

Wait...don't praying mantis' females eat their mates? Hmmmm...so Andrew won't give up Salma? Perhaps a feast is in order?

Malott said...

I think the female bites the male's head off, which also happens to be the custom among many of the married couples I know.

SkyePuppy said...

I left an eloquent comment yesterday. At least I thought I did, but I must have typed the funny letters wrong and not noticed. Sigh! I'll try it again.

Christina,

Your brilliance at assessing bug-travel causes is nearly incomparable. WAAAYYY better than the dolts who think it was because of climate change.

Andrew,

I've thought about packing up, but I'm not sure where to go...

Chris,

Thank you for your (ahem!) concern. Yes, I did check my sheets last night. All clear.

You really know how to make a girl feel secure and comforted at night.