Malott's War Primer... for the IsraelisIn today's lesson we'll learn the best way to end a war!
There are two ways to end a war. The first way is to win the war. Winning the war is very very good! The second way to end a war is to lose the war. Losing the war is very very bad!
In World War II, nice men from America and England fought against bad men from Germany and Japan.
In Europe, the nice men were determined to win the war, so they bombed the living crap out of German cities like Dresden and Hamburg. They killed the bad soldiers and their wives and children and their grandmas and grandpas and their aunts and uncles and their nephews and nieces... And their cousins, too! They killed so many people that the bad German soldiers didn't feel like fighting any more.
In Japan, the nice men dropped nuclear bombs from airplanes and vaporized the bad Japanese soldiers and their wives and children and their grandmas and grandpas and their aunts and uncles and their nephews and nieces... And their cousins, too! They incinerated so many people that the bad Japanese soldiers didn't feel like fighting anymore.
And why did the nice men from America and England do these things? They did it because they loved their wives and children and their grandmas and grandpas and their aunts and uncles and their nephews and nieces... And their cousins so much, that they were willing to do whatever it took to win the war.
In the last seven years the bad men that live in Gaza have launched 8,000 rockets and mortar shells into Israel, trying to blow you to smithereens. The bad men in Iran are making nuclear weapons to incinerate your relatives into little piles of ash. Not very friendly, are they! Besides them, the Syrians want to kill you... The Egyptians want to kill you... And the Saudis, too. It must really suck to be a Jew!
Maybe it's time to quit screwing around and win the war! Maybe you should bomb the living crap out of the bad men in Gaza, and nuke the bad men in Iran. And just keep doing it for as long as it takes... Till those bad men don't feel like fighting anymore!
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4 comments:
American children could use a little "learnin" from that primer too!
I love your "keep it simple" plan to winning this war.
And I agree with cleos, your short history lesson is very comprehensive. It should be required reading for American school children.
We can learn much from history. I have heard that during the banana wars that McArthur threatened muslims with being buried under pig entrails. (Can' get to 'heaven' thru pig guts). And Patton said to negotiate peace with your boot on your enemies throat.
Malott: There is a third option in this war which Israel has done too many times: a truce. Israel has always opted on a truce in the past,(1948-49, 1967, 1973, 2006, etc). This time tell the world if it were as concerned about the Palestinian people, then they would have stopped Hamas a long time ago. The food is shipped to Gaza, Hamas intercepts it and hoards it from the people. Why? It's great PR smoke and mirrors against Israeli's, that's why.
Grrr. Christians will soon be blamed more and more for things that have nothing to do with being a Christian; and it is then we will need the help of nations like Israel.
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