Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Malott Stalked by Fox

No, the four legged kind.

While exercising (walking) on the local high school's dimly-lit track at 4:30 AM, Mr Malott - sensing movement - looked behind him and saw a fox 30 feet away, crouched - and ready to kill.

Fearing dismemberment, Malott's life flashed before his eyes... his childhood in Tokyo... his battle with Kyong Singh... those sweet afternoons outside Osaka with Su Kim Dyong.

Realizing the wrong life was flashing, Malott snapped into action and swung his arms while hissing like a cat. The fox stopped - perhaps confused - but then continued his pursuit.

Totally creeped-out, Malott returned to his truck - still swinging his arms and hissing - and decided to start walking in the daylight hours.

The entire staff at Malott's Blog would like to publicly apologize to any elderly women living on Walnut Street who may have been awakened in the night by a loud hissing sound - and subsequently frightened by a man flailing his arms like a madman over on the track.

Thank you.
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5 comments:

Christina said...

I think you left out a little bit of your post (or perhaps ABC edited it in an attempt to spare you further embarrassment.)

It should read, "The fox stopped -perhaps confused, most definitely intrigued by the strange demonstration - but then continued his pursuit."

And then towards the end....

"The entire staff at Malott's Blog would like to publicly apologize to any elderly women living on Walnut Street who may have been awakened in the night by a loud hissing sound - and subsequently frightened by a man flailing his arms like a madman over on the track. We are only partially responsible for the wild cackling of fox laughter as he related the story to all of his buddies.

9/13/2006 9:21 AM
Malott said...

Christina,

Well it's obvious that I was the only one scared.

I'm wondering if the kids at school had been feeding him.

I thought of Steve Irwin. I wouldn't have gotten near the press... Probably not.

9/13/2006 10:05 AM
SkyePuppy said...

I commend you on your decision to start walking in the daylight. Anything before 5am is still yesterday, and you start messing with the whole space-time continuum when you do things that early.

9/13/2006 10:23 PM
Malott said...

"Anything before 5am is still yesterday..."

Skyepuppy... Dear Skyepuppy,

I have this theory that 97.6 % of all time wasted occurs after 8:00PM. "Go to bed early and get busy early the next morning," as we say in Greentown.

9/14/2006 7:29 AM
SkyePuppy said...

Chris,

Don't forget your history lesson: "And God said, 'Let there be light.' And there was light, and it was good."

After 8PM, there's still light outside (except in the winter), and daylight is never wasted.

Before 5AM, there is no light, and that's not good, because scary things like foxes (for you) or coyotes (for me) lurk in the dark.

But you're right that evenings contain much wasted time. At the moment, though, evenings are when I get to hang out with my daughter and her friends, so I'll have to rediscover the joys of "early to bed..." when I'm with my mom next year.

9/14/2006 10:16 AM

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